Asking for more and for less
The quietly dynamic non-interference that is required for long term recovery from injury includes layers of frustration, encouraging evidence, and shifting modes of intention and attention. The work of the Alexander Technique is indirect and deceptively simple, but it is not easy. Being awake for every activity and welcoming means as opposed to results requires both seriousness and humor. Living with pain and limitation challenges all preconceived notions of who we are in the world. Time takes on a different quality once the unpredictable sequence of recovery is accepted and embraced.
An opportunity is presented in long term recovery, which is not in any way fun or easy. Old habits of response can be examined and addressed as one learns anew basic movements such as walking and descending stairs. Pain becomes a new and relentless cue to misuse. And the habit of checking for pain becomes another opportunity for quieting sensation as any sort of reliable inquiry. Progress in recovery involves attention that includes pain as a clue, but is also wider, bigger and attentive to the whole.
I can walk today with ease and speed, but I may hobble and limp tomorrow. Predictable outcomes are not the deal anymore, at least for now. My knee will never be the same as it was previous to fracture. I can ask for more mobility with less interference, more ease with less contraction, more interior volume with less noticeable effort. I can allow the breath to do itself as a reflection of my entire coordination. so that there is less of me doing, more of not-me doing itself. This is not easy, but it is all I can do: asking for more and doing less. Laughing at myself while I ask for both more and less!